How to tell the difference between Community vs Cults (WIP)
“My personality casts only a particular size net to get to know the world, but you all fill in the rest.”
— Clairaudient dream, Tuesday, September 19, 2023
This is what community means. Each of us maps out our own personal universe. We fill in the gaps for each other. We work collaboratively to uncover the nature of reality and consciousness by sharing our dreams and insights with one another.
As a child, my spirituality was inextricable from organized religions (including one that could be considered a cult). I had no choice or autonomy, and because of that, as a young adult, I stayed far away from any kind of community or communal living — including platonic roommates or even study groups.
I never again wanted strangers holding me accountable for something — especially the evolution of my soul.
Now as an older adult, I want to redefine what community means to me.
I don’t have it figured out yet, but here is where I will keep my list of how I can tell the difference between community vs cults.
I get to show up as a I am in the moment — no pretenses, no judgement.
I am able to transform. The community encourages and supports individual metamorphosis and change.
I can drop in when I want to and come and go as a I please. I owe no one an explanation for my absence, and we greet each other with only love and joy.
No required reading. Period.
I feel inspired and renewed after gatherings. I should never feel lethargic, mind-fucked or like my life-force has been drained from me.
As a community, one of our purposes is to shine light on each other’s divine gifts. In this way, we act like clear mirrors for one another.
The Cosmic Womb
TRANSCRIPT:
Here is a dream that I cannot create imagery for and does not want to be flattened down by the written word. It can only be spoken and walked through with voice.
I am in a house, and it is my house, and it exists outside of space and time. I am hosting a gathering of people that I have known this lifetime, but from different places and ages, and some of whom have passed and are no longer living. But here they are, in my cosmic house. And I am preparing the space.
I am acting as a psychedelic guide, and I am pairing them up, men and women. One man, one woman, to embark on this journey. And this has nothing to do with sexuality or gender. This is just the symbol for the Divine Feminine Energies and the Masculine Energies. And those are, Masculine being our more action-oriented, discerning, rational energies, and the Divine Feminine being our more receptive, open, intuitive, psychic energies.
So here they are, paired up in perfect balance, and I am the psychedelic guide, and I feel very competent and capable in this role, but at the same time — outside of my dream body — I have a dual awareness, and this second awareness is my waking life awareness. “Waking Life Claudia” is there and she's there as the witness and the observer of this vision, where I am acting as the guide or the shaman.
That's when I realize that there is no sacred medicine to dispense to the people. That the path to these alternate realities, or to the ultimate truth, requires each woman in the pairing to spread her vulva as wide as possible for each man to enter by his head, as if it's a reverse birth.
This is the “The Cosmic Womb”. This is the Divine Feminine Womb. There's nothing sexual about this. It's just depicted in a very graphic way within my dream. And this is the point in the dream where my husband walks up to me and he says, “Okay, it's your turn.”
I very sternly shake my finger at him and I say, “No, I am not the portal.”
And then I show him a diorama of my own womb or vulva, only it's not anatomically correct. It's not a diorama of that. It is an ancient, petrified forest. And I say, “Don't you see? This is not a portal.”
And that's when I wake up and I have those words ringing in my head: “No, I am not a portal.”
And I sit with this dream for the whole month of October. And I have other dreams that shed more light on it. And then I come to an understanding of how to act as a conduit and a guide without being used energetically as a portal.
But beyond that, if I was going to bring it down to Earth, as close as I can to the 3D-level I would say that we are each our own portal. That this pairing up of the men and the women was not a message that we need someone external, like a priest or a shaman, to experience other truths, other realities.
It was just the message of the balance of both, of being grounded and yet open to these divine cosmic influences, and of experiencing existence that way. Through your own portal.
Notes on Multidimensional Consciousness
Consciousness follows a "Torus effect," which entails highly non-linear time with everything happening simultaneously in the NOW moment
We are all actors in the play of life, following a script initially pre-selected or devised by our HIGHERSELVES residing in higher dimensional consciousness for the good of all
We possess an inherent capability, the 6th sense or power of intuition, which originates from beyond space-time and serves as a means for us to stay attuned with our HIGHERSELF
Physicality is illusory, as we mostly thrive beyond time and space in higher dimensions, in our ethereal or angelic state
We incarnate in this timeline to play a role in each other's lives, facilitating the process of spiritual education, and should abstain from judging one another
These bullet points are summarized from Mohsen Paul Sarfarazi’s papers on multidimensional consciousness available online here.
Your dreambody is an Avatar and how to grow a bigger vessel
Some people call it Spirit — this invisible force that guides us. I call them my guides or angels — but it is Spirit and “in a sense” it is my higher spirit.
Lately I see the visual of angles or angels as angles. These rays of light that originate from higher realms and intersect on this plane, and in that intersection I find a merged consciousness that wants to speak and so I give it voice.
At first, I wondered if I was channeling. I tried to be very aware and conscientious that maybe my system was being hijacked. I am not paranoid or an alarmist by nature, but I am hypervigilant to ensure I never feel puppeteered. It’s vital to this path that I ask questions and I advocate for myself, in real life and in dreams.
A dream is a composite of other realities and realms. The goal is not to become lucid in dreams, but to become lucid in waking life. As that happens, you begin to see waking life is no different than a dream. The Universe is always communicating with you.
Dreams should feel like soul hunting. You wake up with more aspects of your soul. Your energetic body becomes a bigger vessel.
One day, you’ll realize your dreambody is an Avatar. A composite itself — just like dreams – a new body merged from other dimensions and timelines.
My spirit guides gave me a dream once about my container being too small or unequipped for the consciousness streams coming through. Over time, I grew a bigger boat or vessel.
How did I do that? I believe it was this process of introspection, reflection and integration. I believe every dream is a request for action, and by sharing my dreams and visions I eject them from my energetic system. This helps me avoid overloading or burn out. Daily practices for me also include grounding exercises and psychic protection visualizations, but most importantly I keep the channels of communication with the higher realms open in the form of prayer, invocation or meditation. I don’t do all of them each day, but I do at least one.
This whole life process for me is about growing a bigger boat.
My aim is not to reach a Buddhic state or sainthood. I love being human and imperfect. I welcome confusion and emotional knots. I value obstacles in life because my spiritual toolkit for solving these problems keeps growing. It’s such a heavenly gift to be able to learn from life and this is why I incarnated.
Life on Earth is school and in my heart I’ve always been that kid in the class who sits in the front and asks a lot of questions. This is innate to my personality, even beyond Earth.
I used to think Teacher’s Pet was a negative complex or trait, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting to be a Teacher’s Pet if that teacher is the God beyond Gods and the Source from which we came from.
But for NOW, and in this brief lifetime, my teachers are Earth and Humanity and Divine Love.
Updated: How to be be charismatic and attract your destiny
“Think about what would save your life, and then reach toward that.”
At a festive gathering — in between the worlds — a skinny, awkward man asks a charismatic witch man what he could do to attract love and his destiny. The witch man says, “Sit at the corner of the table and think about what you could do or say to save your life right now and then reach toward that.”
Dream, September 27, 2021
Charisma is your personal magic. It's so easy to recognize charisma in others — they are charming and alluring. "Reach toward what would save your life" means align yourself with your natural gifts and divine purpose and then head toward that — and don't look back. Your love and destiny will follow.
How to avoid curses
My mirrored goddess, meets me in a dark realm. I ask her, “How can I avoid curses?”
She answers: “How can they curse something that shapeshifts and never walks in a straight line?”
She teaches me to wear mirrors as protection. Any energy and thoughtforms sent my way is reflected back. If it’s bad, it’s bad. If it’s Love, then it’s so much Love beamed back brighter than before.
Dark Earth Goddess and the soiling of the Soul
I’m headed to Ireland in a few weeks. I’ve been summoned there by my dreams. I find it to be true that once you set an intention to travel or commit to a future event in your life, you can begin to pull energy from that future moment.
Here is a dream that was set in Ireland, both in a mythological past timeline as well as in this linear future.
Dream, June 1, 2023
My Mother or Fairy Godmother or Past-Life Mother tells me a story. She says, “All my Daughters have Dark Earth within.”
I see my human body woven with grass and muddy earth.
It’s ok to make mistakes of varying degrees, she says. Sometimes the darker the regret, the closer we are to Mother Earth’s forgiveness.
These are human lessons to learn. In Heaven there are no mistakes. This being human is a gift— how else will we grow?
I see the seams of my body sewn with soil.
The soul “in a sense” is soiled when we incarnate. This is how I will grow.
Something I will learn in Ireland.
Apostolic advice from Jesus
“Be wise as serpents and innocent as doves.”
Translating your divinity
Your Spontaneous Self is a correspondence between intelligence, intuition and inspiration. This is Divinity — a free-flowing stream of information from the higher realms.
The rational mind doesn’t have to navigate Life alone. You can experience the Divine without understanding it.
You are allowed to say, “I have no words.”
Your Spontaneous Self just knows. Somewhere between Angels and Animals, you can find yourself.
The astral assignment I give to myself (and to you) is to find a way to translate your divinity. If not words, then art. If not art, then service. If not service, then just by being.
How to tell the difference between Judgement and Discernment
Judgement hardens you. You feel it in your body. Judgement is mental and emotional rigidity. When you place a value judgement on reality, you stiffen it.
Discernment is closely aligned with your innate Intuition. It has your highest good in mind. Discernment has no emotion attached it, it just knows. It reminds you to protect yourself — reset your energetic boundaries and rethink your next move.
Discernment allows for the flowing of life, Judgement resists it.
Judgement will make you a victim to reality and Discernment empowers you to create reality.
Visions of the Holographic Universe, Magnetars and Flowering in Spirit
“He was remembering with his mind and she was remembering with her senses.”
As I woke up this morning, I saw my body stretch out toward the sun and my arms stretch above my head as if I was flowering 🪷. I felt like I had physically flowered, but in reality my body didn’t move an inch. Then I opened my eyes having already stretched out my spirit.
🌌 Inner imagery:
Visions of the Holographic Universe. In dreams, I see glimpses of layered horizons. Time as a linear line and and Time as angles entering from parallel dimensions. Stellar rays project into the Earth sphere creating distortions, reflections and reality screens. Somewhere in all the energy noise I find myself as beams of light converging. I see how our physicality and our form is created from beyond the horizons.
Working map of my astral travels and visions of the holographic universe. Need to add more dimensions of consciousness and realms I’ve visited to date.
🤫 Secret desires:
To become a Magnetar after death and be described as a “highly magnetic stellar corpse” Why? Because I’m made of stardust and consciousness is magnetic and all I want to do is be bright and pull the universe toward me.
Emotions as the doorway to higher frequencies
Abraham-Hicks Emotional Guidance Scale
Emotions as both a ladder and a doorway to higher frequencies. You can’t jump from Anger to Joy, you must climb the rungs one by one. Likewise, you can’t bypass the dense, bad emotions. You have to walk through the front door of an emotion and trust you’ll find another door out. Every emotion can transform you for the better. RELATED
A vision of cosmic grief
Psychedelic vision, Friday, December 16, 2022
There is an invisible conveyer belt that extends from Earth to Heaven.
I sat underneath and watched the bodies drop as the souls ejected themselves.
A landfill of spiritual refuse.
I sifted through the matter left behind. I mourned the un-lived potentials within.
Lives that never fully expanded out of fear.
The life-body is a house meant for remodeling and adding on and enlarging in every way.
This is cosmic grief I am feeling.
Some of these life-bodies will be recycled. Return to grow again. Others forgotten.
I think of my own body hanging from that conveyer belt — of all the rooms I have yet to discover within me.
Related: Explore your mental floorplan
The Sacred Dancer Archetype
The Sacred Dancer Archetype
I travel between the worlds like a journalist. I ask questions. Demand answers.
I ask “Who am I?”
Am I the voice that is asking questions?
No. I am the one that is remembering.
They say, You are the Sacred Dancer integrating all the frequencies.
The Sacred Dancer does not need to understand.
She is movement and grace and spinning through realities.
She trusts the rhythm and flow and never asks why.
Related: Dream from Monday, November 14, 2022
Gossip Angels
We sat huddled on the floor
gossiping like school girls —
in the purest way
and I can’t tell you
what was said
because it’s a secret
but it was about you
and your fears
and how it’s all going to be
OK.
The 2,000-year-old Claudia Tree
In a dream, they say “You are not the first iteration of Claudia.
You are merely a branch of a 2,000-year-old Claudia Tree.
Feel the ancient wisdom within you.”
I am my mothers tears remembering me.
An alchemical dream about Coagulatio
Dream, Wednesday, December 7, 2022
I am on a pilgrimage, wading through shallow waters, trying to find something I lost.
A half-buried plane from long ago.
Something that came down from the spirit and wanted to be concretized. A thought, an idea, an inspiration.
I know it’s from my childhood. I know it is a piece of my soul. I stare at the marvel of it all.
Spirit to matter. Crashed and buried. Things lost can always be found.
Related: An alchemical dream about Calcinatio
The Dreaming
I was in Egypt for two weeks in November, anchoring myself in temples and tombs along the Nile River. My dreams in Egypt were potent and bold and alien, but I have yet to translate them into a language or imagery I can share.
Dreams tend to screen themselves as something mundane to avoid breaking our brains. My husband says he only dreams of boring things like emptying dishwashers and riding passenger side in cars — but those dreams are also potent, and they have messages too.
I had several dreams of Susan Sarandon gifting me things and taking me under her wing before I realized who she symbolized. She was my Goddess archetype and once the goddess broke through me (read about it here), I stopped dreaming of Susan Sarandon and I started dreaming of the Goddess herself. Sometimes the goddess appears as Isis, or she is a beautiful warrior woman with wings or sometimes she is me. A screen is no longer needed in that case.
In Egypt there were no screens over my dreams. The veil was lifted and I was shot out to other planets, rapid-fire slipping into other consciousnesses — most of them not even human.
I remind myself that these visions are not fixed realities inviting me to come and live within them. They are tools to help dismantle the mental frameworks that were never mine to begin with. The ways of thinking that were handed down to me externally.
When you decide to spiral inward instead of out toward the world, you'll quickly discover there is a deep, deep abyss within you — and it is roaring.
In dreams I fly, I stretch across time, I create new realities, I shape-shift, I teleport, I talk to angels, animals, aliens and ghosts.
Dreams act as floodgates for the imaginal and the imagination. They create new ways of seeing that will defy everything you knew before.
With that said, in waking life I will never levitate. I will never manifest billions of dollars. I will never wake up one morning in a different timeline or reality.
I have limitations because I am anchored here on Earth, and before I was born I made a promise to play this thing out as human and to play by the rules or laws of nature.
And all of that is OK with me, because I have my dreams. And when I leave my body at night and I travel through the worlds, it's not an act of escapism. It is a radical act of humanism.
I only have this short blip of life and I hope I'm doing it right, and some people stay in school forever or go to church for guidance or fill their brains with books, but I just go to The Dreaming.
Every night is like reaching into a grab bag of universal consciousness and pulling out other-worldly views of time and space and love and humanness.
Here is an unedited stream of consciousness after one of those dreams in Egypt:
Monday, November 14, 2022, 11:49pm. Dream notes. They are showing me my home planet. I can’t confirm if it is Mars, but Mars-like, red rocks. Someday they’ll find the tombs there. Maybe my body is there or maybe I only had a light body, not a physical body. The creature life there glowed in the dark or was bioluminescent in psychedelic colors. Maybe I was a creature or maybe I was ALL the creatures. One entity … the entire planet breathing in my bioluminescent veins. I danced like an aboriginal with neon colored ink on my body. And when I danced new realities materialized before me. Dreams were my bloodline, like now. This is just one lifespan. Non-human. Not of this Earth. I have transcended before on another planet. This is why I feel like a gypsy, why I have no roots, why stability can sometimes feel like a prison. All these facets of life we chose for ourselves are man-made obstacle courses for us to “remember” and grow past our temporary circumstances. I have to extend my soul spirit out past this planet, make it reach back in to the future where the past begins and connect all my lives on the wheel of time. All that wisdom from other lives, other planets. The fruits of my experience. The wheel must become that. When I say I have to “get off the wheel,” I mean I need to be in the hub driving it, fully remembering all my alien lives. All the aspects can come home now.
Washing instructions for auric bodies
When your body feels heavy with emotion, remember you can take it off like clothing.
In a vision I see everything as pale denim blue, like all the colors have run by mistake.
I take off my emotional body and I see pockets of fluid that need to be drained. These are my tears and sadness. I hang it up on the line to dry.
I take off my mental body and I see how it is wrinkled and stained. These are my assumptions that need to be washed and ironed out.
Our auric bodies are removable and washable.
You are a spirit with multiple bodies. Each one serves a purpose, and each one should be treated differently — but they all need to be cleansed again and again.
On laundry days, I walk around naked in spirit — a respite from the human form.
Night terror hate mind-dump
I woke up at 11:54pm on Saturday, October 29 with the message that I should be doing a nightly “Night terror hate mind-dump.”
Usually my astral homework is not as aggressive-sounding, but the purpose of these divine “assignments” seems to be to help unblock stuck energy and emotions.
So last night before bed, I did it. I created a note on my phone and I listed all my nightmare-inducing stressors. After I wrote them out I stared at my list and read them over and over until they seemed ridiculous and irrational.
Then, I let out a deep breath and let myself fall asleep peacefully, without the weight of these invisible terrors.
FYI, “Chona” is my dad’s 4-year-old English bulldog who is perfectly healthy, but who I often worry about for no good reason. Here is a picture of her insisting she is a lap dog, taken on my 38th birthday:
